Pissed off HuffPo Claims Bar So Low, as Long as Donald Trump Doesn’t Barf, He’ll Win the Debate Tonight

Tonight is predicted to be the most-watched presidential debate in American history.

HuffPo writer Amanda Terkel is mad that Trump is going to boast his “HUGE win” (although, if she really even halfway understood Trump, she would have taken the opportunity to write “YUGE!” instead).

Terkel doesn’t waste time, opening with:

Donald Trump is an arrogant slacker who wastes his time hanging out at greasy spoons when he should be spending his time studying ― not like that striving know-it-all Tracy Flick Hillary Clinton. Or at least, that’s what Trump’s campaign wants you to believe.

In the run-up to the first presidential debate Monday night, Trump’s team has been working to lower the bar so far for him that it’s basically just lying on the ground. Story after story talks about how Clinton is spending her time poring over wonky policy details in briefing books while Trump is just hanging out.

That’s not exactly true…

Word is, Trump has been studying decades of tapes of Hillary’s past debates, keeping track of both the highlights and lowpoints… what makes her tick and what puts her on the defensive and makes her fail.

Although Hillary has been doing the same, taking notes on the things that have agitated Trump in past debates.

To knock Trump off his game, people advising Clinton have been looking for a one-line retort that will be a memorable moment from the contest.

The fight has already begun in the lead up to this debate, priming it for ridiculousness, with Hillary inviting billionaire owner of the Dallas Mavericks and vocal opponent of Donald Trump Mark Cuban to sit in the front row as a taunt.

Unfortunately, she stuck her foot in the quicksand. In response, the Trump camp invited Bill Clinton’s mistress Gennifer Flowers, who carried on a 12-year-long affair with the former president. Apparently Paula Jones, who sued Bill for sexual harassment, now claims she wants to attend and sit next to Gennifer, and Bill rape accuser Juanita Broaddrick says she’d attend as well.

Terkel goes on to say:

“Hillary Clinton is on the ropes and needs to change the game,” Jason Miller, the Trump campaign’s senior communications adviser, said in a memo. “Given her extensive experience debating, high level of preparation and scripted nature Clinton’s campaign no doubt views [the Monday debate] as the best opportunity to alter the trajectory of the race. … [Trump is] not rehearsing canned 30-second sound bites or spending hours in the film room like an NFL player. He will be prepared, but most importantly, he will be himself.”

This sort of expectation-managing creates an imbalanced scenario in which, as long as Trump shows up on time and manages not to puke or something, pundits will declare him the winner.

Because Hillary will sound like an establishment puppet who has been rehearsing for over three decades, and Trump actually sounds like a real person who can relate to other real people?

What a circus this is turning out to be… and nothing has even happened yet.

Be sure to bring your popcorn… history is going down tonight.