Conspiracy Fact and Theory

What an Ass: MO Governor Jay Nixon and the Midterm Election Scandal of #ButtCrackGate

Not sure what stinks worse here: the hilarious Tweet Governor Jay Nixon sent out to get Missourians to the polls, or…wait for it…the cover up. (HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHA)

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(This story is dedicated to my mom.)

Missouri Governor Jay Nixon (D, for Democrat, you know, the party that traditionally uses the symbol of the donkey aka an ass) is finding himself much more popular on the national stage today than, well…maybe the whole time he’s been governor.

Why, you ask?

This:

The requisite politician-y “make your vote count” (by getting your butts to the polls) Tweet was sent out on Nixon’s official Twitter account after he voted yesterday. Nice timing on the cameraman, huh? It’s unclear as to whether it was sent out by an aide or the man himself.

Here’s a close up (not that you want to see a close up):

Sorry. My bad. That’s an amended close up someone put up in response. It is the age of the Internet, after all.

Because even though the Tweet was quickly disappeared “up the memory hole” as Twitchy put it (you knew this was coming), the plethora of ASStoundingly bad puns (yeah, that one was so lame it was physically hard for me to type it) has not stopped yet.

In fact, it has gone viral, mutating into the Twitter Trend #ButtCrackGate.

Here comes aaaaaallllllllllllllllll the jokes:

 

Along with all the pun-filled headlines:

PoliticMO: Nixon the butt of jokes following Election Day Tweet

KCTV Kansas City: Jay Nixon inadvertently makes Missouri butt of jokes

Chicago Sun-Times: Jay Nixon takes crack at election day tweet, fails

Canada Free Press: MISSOURI: Democrat governor wants you to vote. No butts about it (except this one)

Twitchy: Up the ‘memory hole’? Gov. Jay Nixon sends out the ULTIMATE butt tweet

Tee hee.

#ButtCrackGate is really bringing out the inner eight-year-old in many Missourians who know how much Governor Nixon sucks ass. (HA!)

Seriously, though. Maybe it’s because I’m from Missouri, and I know how much corporate ass this governor kissed to help get this position and the generous favors he had to return after he was elected (just ask any Missouri state employee about all the changes the new Governor instituted to everything statewide from state worker health insurance provider to phone system upgrades at every state agency — both contracts ever-so-coincidentally received by companies who were generous donors to Nixon’s political campaign)..

…But(t) I find this entire situation utterly hilarious.

Public figures should realize by now that A) deleting an embarrassing Tweet never works, and B) only draws more attention to the fail.

Not sure what stinks worse.

The Tweet or… wait for it…

The cover up.

Hahahahhahahahahahhahaha—

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