Use a Lot of Condoms? You Might Be Reported to DHS

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Top Tier Gear USA


One of the most startling developments in the War on Terror, was when the Department of Homeland Security started classifying previously benign behaviors and beliefs as signs of terrorism. Are you a conservative or a libertarian? Terrorist. Are you an evangelical Christian? Terrorist. Have you ever taken pictures of monuments or infrastructure? Super terrorist.

Now the DHS is starting to apply that same logic to other crimes, like sex trafficking. They’re going to start teaching hotel staff how to spot the tell-tale signs of sex trafficking, which include “seeing too many condoms in garbage cans,” “frequent use of ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign,” and if “the minibar needs to be frequently restocked.” So I guess if you’re on your honeymoon, you might be suspected of sex trafficking.

Some of the items on the list make sense, like if someone “claims to be an adult but looks adolescent.” But the vast majority of these behaviors are what you would expect from a normal hotel patron, or at worst, a prostitute peddling consensual sex. Many of them make absolutely no sense when considered together like “guests with too many personal hygiene products, especially ‘lubrication, douches'” and “guests with too few personal possessions.” And of course, the list wouldn’t be complete without “rooms paid for with cash or a rechargeable credit card.” In this day an age, anyone caught using currency that can’t be traced must be guilty of something.

Essentially, this list is designed to do the same thing that Homeland Security’s criteria for terrorism suspects is supposed to do: Turn normal behavior into suspicious behavior, make us paranoid of everyone we meet, train us to snitch on our fellow citizens, and foster a climate of fear in America. This shouldn’t come as a surprise, because the employees of DHS would be out of a job if we weren’t so afraid.

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Contributed by Joshua Krause of The Daily Sheeple.

Joshua Krause is a reporter, writer and researcher at The Daily Sheeple. He was born and raised in the Bay Area and is a freelance writer and author. You can follow Joshua’s reports at Facebook or on his personal Twitter. Joshua’s website is Strange Danger .

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  • It would be fun to fill them with water and throw them down on the ninjas as they raid.

    • cecil82

      They are not “ninja’s”, they are thugs

      • Not until they act like them, as they seldom do when they are preadolescent on Halloween night.

  • Helluva3ngineer

    Sorry everyone. That was me.

  • jim_robert

    Is picking my nose or excessive flatulence on there? Constant yawning while Obunger reads off this teleprompter? Otherwise, I’m in trouble

    • LRob

      Not sure about the first two, nose picking, probably no big deal. Flatulence may indicate you’re eating too much cabbage, you might be a German infiltrator. BUT, yawning during DEAR LEADER’s speeches? Yeah, you’re in for trouble on that one. Shows a complete lack of respect for his intellect, such as it is. You should be marched off to an ‘enlightenment camp’, and dealt with in a most severe manner.

  • Stew E

    Does DHS have a purpose. What an incredible waste of our tax dollars. We need to eliminate this group. They have never done anything to help this country

    • Most of the alphabet agencies need to be eliminated or greatly curtailed for many valid reasons. One is that many are lawless criminal activities like DHS and ATF who did the F&F thing .quite illegally !

    • DHS is largely an amalgam that should be unamalgamated.

  • Guillotine_ready

    Is laughing during the pledge of allegiance on there? How about telling a liberal bureaucrat to go to hell.
    What about windows shopping, or checking product info with a bar code scanner?

  • whiteberry

    They will stop at nothing to convict us all of something… anything!!

  • berrybestfarm

    Oh swell! Now I’m a terrorist for ordering boxes of condoms our local speaker’s bureau distributes freely with info at world AIDS day each year.

  • Reverend Draco

    Well shit – when I work out of town, I hang the “Do Not Disturb” sign 6 days out of the week.

    Guess I must be committing acts of terrorism between loads. . .

  • SP_88

    I suggest that we find the full list of “suspicious activity” from DHS and then we all start doing as many things on their list as possible. It will make their list even more useless than it already is. If everyone is a suspect, nobody is. The point of their list is to single out certain people. And any criteria that applies to everyone or almost everyone is useless. They need to have criteria that narrows down who they are looking for. If they have to look into too many people because their criteria are too broad, they will be forced to eliminate certain things because they are not going to be able to investigate everyone.
    The government may have the capability to gather a lot of information about us, but they are not efficient enough or competent enough to deal with large numbers of people who aren’t really terrorists clogging up their operations. Look at the TSA and how they only found 5% of the contraband that came through the airport and 95% of the guns, bombs, knives, etc were able to sneak past these imbeciles because they were too busy looking at tits and ass on their body scanners. Government agencies are notoriously inefficient and incompetent. If you want something to end up completely FUBAR then let the government handle it. They are good at spending hundreds of millions of dollars on things that are overly complicated, woefully inadequate and more likely to be turned against the people than used to protect them.
    So let’s all be terrorist suspects and force them to narrow down their list of suspicious activity. Maybe they will end up doing their job instead of screwing around on our dime. As if.

    • This is the reason why I added the list of NSA trigger terms to my email signatures. In case you’d like to do likewise:

      Use of any of the following words will get your email flagged for secondary screening by the NSA:

      Waihopai, INFOSEC, Information Security, Information Warfare, IW, IS, Priavacy, Information Terrorism, Terrorism Defensive Information, Defense Information Warfare, Offensive Information, Offensive Information Warfare, National Information Infrastructure, InfoSec, Reno, Compsec, Computer Terrorism, Firewalls, Secure Internet Connections, ISS, Passwords, DefCon V, Hackers, Encryption, Espionage, USDOJ, NSA, CIA, S/Key, SSL, FBI, Secert Service, USSS, Defcon, Military, White House, Undercover, NCCS, Mayfly, PGP, PEM, RSA, Perl-RSA, MSNBC, bet, AOL, AOL TOS, CIS, CBOT, AIMSX, STARLAN, 3B2, BITNET, COSMOS, DATTA, E911, FCIC, HTCIA, IACIS, UT/RUS, JANET, JICC, ReMOB, LEETAC, UTU, VNET, BRLO, BZ, CANSLO, CBNRC, CIDA, JAVA, Active X, Compsec 97, LLC, DERA, Mavricks, Meta-hackers, ^?, Steve Case, Tools, Telex, Military Intelligence, Scully, Flame, Infowar, Bubba, Freeh, Archives, Sundevil, jack, Investigation, ISACA, NCSA, spook words, Verisign, Secure, ASIO, Lebed, ICE, NRO, Lexis-Nexis, NSCT, SCIF, FLiR, Lacrosse, Flashbangs, HRT, DIA, USCOI, CID, BOP, FINCEN, FLETC, NIJ, ACC, AFSPC, BMDO, NAVWAN, NRL, RL, NAVWCWPNS, NSWC, USAFA, AHPCRC, ARPA, LABLINK, USACIL, USCG, NRC, ~, CDC, DOE, FMS, HPCC, NTIS, SEL, USCODE, CISE, SIRC, CIM, ISN, DJC, SGC, UNCPCJ, CFC, DREO, CDA, DRA, SHAPE, SACLANT, BECCA, DCJFTF, HALO, HAHO, FKS, 868, GCHQ, DITSA, SORT, AMEMB, NSG, HIC, EDI, SAS, SBS, UDT, GOE, DOE, GEO, Masuda, Forte, AT, GIGN, Exon Shell, CQB, CONUS, CTU, RCMP, GRU, SASR, GSG-9, 22nd SAS, GEOS, EADA, BBE, STEP, Echelon, Dictionary, MD2, MD4, MDA, MYK, 747,777, 767, MI5, 737, MI6, 757, Kh-11, Shayet-13, SADMS, Spetznaz, Recce, 707, CIO, NOCS, Halcon, Duress, RAID, Psyops, grom, D-11, SERT, VIP, ARC, S.E.T. Team, MP5k, DREC, DEVGRP, DF, DSD, FDM, GRU, LRTS, SIGDEV, NACSI, PSAC, PTT, RFI, SIGDASYS, TDM. SUKLO, SUSLO, TELINT, TEXTA. ELF, LF, MF, VHF, UHF, SHF, SASP, WANK, Colonel, domestic disruption, smuggle, 15kg, nitrate, Pretoria, M-14, enigma, Bletchley Park, Clandestine, nkvd, argus, afsatcom, CQB, NVD, Counter Terrorism Security, Rapid Reaction, Corporate Security, Police, sniper, PPS, ASIS, ASLET, TSCM, Security Consulting, High Security, Security Evaluation, Electronic Surveillance, MI-17, Counterterrorism, spies, eavesdropping, debugging, interception, COCOT, rhost, rhosts, SETA, Amherst, Broadside, Capricorn, Gamma, Gorizont, Guppy, Ionosphere, Mole, Keyhole, Kilderkin, Artichoke, Badger, Cornflower, Daisy, Egret, Iris, Hollyhock, Jasmine, Juile, Vinnell, B.D.M.,Sphinx, Stephanie, Reflection, Spoke, Talent, Trump, FX, FXR, IMF, POCSAG, Covert Video, Intiso, r00t, lock picking, Beyond Hope, csystems, passwd, 2600 Magazine, Competitor, EO, Chan, Alouette,executive, Event Security, Mace, Cap-Stun, stakeout, ninja, ASIS, ISA, EOD, Oscor, Merlin, NTT, SL-1, Rolm, TIE, Tie-fighter, PBX, SLI, NTT, MSCJ, MIT, 69, RIT, Time, MSEE, Cable & Wireless, CSE, Embassy, ETA, Porno, Fax, finks, Fax encryption, white noise, pink noise, CRA, M.P.R.I., top secret, Mossberg, 50BMG, Macintosh Security, Macintosh Internet Security, Macintosh Firewalls, Unix Security, VIP Protection, SIG, sweep, Medco, TRD, TDR, sweeping, TELINT, Audiotel, Harvard, 1080H, SWS, Asset, Satellite imagery, force, Cypherpunks, Coderpunks, TRW, remailers, replay, redheads, RX-7, explicit, FLAME, Pornstars, AVN, Playboy, Anonymous, Sex, chaining, codes, Nuclear, 20, subversives, SLIP, toad, fish, data havens, unix, c, a, b, d, the, Elvis, quiche, DES, 1*, NATIA, NATOA, sneakers, counterintelligence, industrial espionage, PI, TSCI, industrial intelligence, H.N.P., Juiliett Class Submarine, Locks, loch, Ingram Mac-10, sigvoice, ssa, E.O.D., SEMTEX, penrep, racal, OTP, OSS, Blowpipe, CCS, GSA, Kilo Class, squib, primacord, RSP, Becker, Nerd, fangs, Austin, Comirex, GPMG, Speakeasy, humint, GEODSS, SORO, M5, ANC, zone, SBI, DSS, S.A.I.C., Minox, Keyhole, SAR, Rand Corporation, Wackenhutt, EO, Wackendude, mol, Hillal, GGL, CTU, botux, Virii, CCC, Blacklisted 411, Internet Underground, XS4ALL, Retinal Fetish, Fetish, Yobie, CTP, CATO, Phon-e, Chicago Posse, l0ck, spook keywords, PLA, TDYC, W3, CUD, CdC, Weekly World News, Zen, World Domination, Dead, GRU, M72750, Salsa, 7, Blowfish, Gorelick, Glock, Ft. Meade, press-release, Indigo, wire transfer, e-cash, Bubba the Love Sponge, Digicash, zip, SWAT, Ortega, PPP, crypto-anarchy, AT&T, SGI, SUN, MCI, Blacknet, Middleman, KLM, Blackbird, plutonium, Texas, jihad, SDI, Uzi, Fort Meade, supercomputer, bullion, 3, Blackmednet, Propaganda, ABC, Satellite phones, Planet-1, cryptanalysis, nuclear, FBI, Panama, fissionable, Sears Tower, NORAD, Delta Force, SEAL, virtual, Dolch, secure shell, screws, Black-Ops, Area51, SABC, basement, data-haven, black-bag, TEMPSET, Goodwin, rebels, ID, MD5, IDEA, garbage, market, beef, Stego, unclassified, utopia, orthodox, Alica, SHA, Global, gorilla, Bob, Pseudonyms, MITM, Gray Data, VLSI, mega, Leitrim, Yakima, Sugar Grove, Cowboy, Gist, 8182, Gatt, Platform, 1911, Geraldton, UKUSA, veggie, 3848, Morwenstow, Consul, Oratory, Pine Gap, Menwith, Mantis, DSD, BVD, 1984, Flintlock, cybercash, government, hate, speedbump, illuminati, president, freedom, cocaine, $, Roswell, ESN, COS, E.T., credit card, b9, fraud, assasinate, virus, anarchy, rogue, mailbomb, 888, Chelsea, 1997, Whitewater, MOD, York, plutonium, William Gates, clone, BATF, SGDN, Nike, Atlas, Delta, TWA, Kiwi, PGP 2.6.2., PGP 5.0i, PGP 5.1, siliconpimp, Lynch, 414, Face, Pixar, IRIDF, eternity server, Skytel, Yukon, Templeton, LUK, Cohiba, Soros, Standford, niche, 51, H&K, USP, ^, sardine, bank, EUB, USP, PCS, NRO, Red Cell, Glock 26, snuffle, Patel, package, ISI, INR, INS, IRS, GRU, RUOP, GSS, NSP, SRI, Ronco, Armani, BOSS, Chobetsu, FBIS, BND, SISDE, FSB, BfV, IB, froglegs, JITEM, SADF, advise, TUSA, HoHoCon, SISMI, FIS, MSW, Spyderco, UOP, SSCI, NIMA, MOIS, SVR, SIN, advisors, SAP, OAU, PFS, Aladdin, chameleon man, Hutsul, CESID, Bess, rail gun, Peering, 17, 312, NB, CBM, CTP, Sardine, SBIRS, SGDN, ADIU, DEADBEEF, IDP, IDF, Halibut, SONANGOL, Flu, &, Loin, PGP 5.53, EG&G, AIEWS, AMW, WORM, MP5K-SD, 1071, WINGS, cdi, DynCorp, UXO, Ti, THAAD, package, chosen, PRIME, SURVIAC

      • SP_88

        Bubba the Love Sponge? Why would the NSA care if I e-mailed his name? BTW, some of his material was hysterical. I was listening to him doing Ned crank calling people on the radio in my car and I had to pull over because I was laughing to hard to drive.
        And sorry for sounding stupid but what does it mean to add to my e-mail signatures?

        • Most email servers offer the option to add signature lines to the end of any email sent from them. The meaning of doing so would be up to the user. I added the NSA trigger to my signature lists because it will cause their scanners to highlight every one of my emails, so they’ll never be able to claim that I’d done a Hillary, and hidden anything from them. It will also cause them undue application of their attention to someone who just wants them to obey their oaths to protect and defend the Constitution instead of committing treason with everything they do.

          • SP_88

            Ok, thanks. I see it now.

  • Maddog

    They should add too many aspirin purchases to the list. Its one of the best ways to prevent sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancies.

  • Maddog

    An extreme blowout in the morning will get you on the list.

  • Pretty obvious our government and all its phony agencies are completely whacked and out of control ! nothing new at all, just more of the same insanity forced on you to pay for ! .

  • I_P_Frehley

    Defund, dismantle DHS and arrest most “agents” and management for treason.

  • ccambridge

    Is the dis investigating the horn dogs at the FBI.