The Stupid, It Burns: Government at Work – In One Perfect Photo

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Top Tier Gear USA

Presidential Duties

We recently stumbled upon an image in one of the more obscure corners of the intertubes which we felt we had to share with our readers. It provides us with a nice metaphor for the meaningfulness of government activity. First, here is a look at the picture – just quietly contemplate it for while and let it work its magic on you:


Yes, these two gentlemen are actually watering a tree in the middle of a downpour… 

You may have noticed that the two gentlemen with the watering cans have two living umbrella-holders at their disposal. Obviously, they must be VIPs of some sort.

The tree getting victimized in the picture is actually a young fir, and one must fear that it will drown. Small firs do of course need water if they want to become big firs, but there can be too much of a good thing, and this may well be such a case.

We thought we’d never see anyone watering plants during a rainstorm while exuding such a solemn sense of duty. Normally one would expect such people to exhibit a somewhat more maniacal demeanor. This goes to show that there’s a first time for everything.

We were of course wondering who and what exactly we were looking at, and it turns out that the two gentlemen are Gurbanguly Berdimuhamedov, the president of Turkmenistan, and Belarusian president Alexander Lukashenko, in the process of planting (and evidently, right away drowning) a fir at the Alley of Honored Guests near the Palace of Independence in Minsk.

Free Advice

We want to take this opportunity to dispense some free advice to the fathers of the young fir: it is probably not necessary to water plants while it is raining, as rain is reportedly quite wet all by itself (step out from underneath the umbrella next time, and you will see what we mean).

Still, the presidents have to be commended for not shirking their planting duties in the face of inclement weather, and we want to thank them for providing us with this moving image. And of course, we wish the fir all the best.

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  • Frank

    PATER TENEBRARUM must be a synonym for “complete waste of breath.” Its obvious that these two heads of state were doing something symbolic, like watering a tree of peace or mutual collaboration – the key word being symbolic, regardless of the rainstorm. BTW, newly-planted trees take A LOT of water, so doubtful that this young Fir will suffer in the slightest – for all you tree-hugging Plant Rights types out there.

    • Joe2D2

      The symbolism is in the stupidity of this image as it fully embodies the redundant waste of government activity. I know these things can be difficult for the low IQ types to comprehend, so there buddy, I spelled it the fuck out for you.

      • ReverendDraco✓ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ ᵃᶜᶜᵒᵘᶰᵗ

        You used words too big for his one tiny brain cell, though.

        • Frank

          Personal attacks are your forte, Rev, and you know you’re a Class A abusive turd, so keep it.

          • ReverendDraco✓ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ ᵃᶜᶜᵒᵘᶰᵗ

            Sorry, chuckles – my tolerance for idiots has completely evaporated.

            Every time you say something completely moronic, I’ll make sure to remind you just how mindless you are.

            Don’t like it?
            Get a fucking education, Junior.

          • Frank

            It has nothing to do with education, Rev, but with Wit – of which yours is passe. Now, go beat your wife.

          • ReverendDraco✓ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ ᵃᶜᶜᵒᵘᶰᵗ

            You’ve not gotten a proper example of my wit – I save it for people who possess sufficient intellectual capacity to grasp it. . . which you certainly do not, nor ever will.

            Now, take your one tiny brain cell and go play with it in the corner.

          • Frank

            You demonstrate your “wit” every time you open your mouth to speak, and from your literary competence demonstrated in your posts, it is wont of substance. Its okay if you’re jealous of my one brain cell, as you have only half of that to work with. You think too highly of yourself, Rev, as most of your comments are one-line snipes that add no value to any substantive discussion.

      • Frank

        In words YOU can understand, Fuck You, you abusive Jackass.

        • Joe2D2

          Even when given a map to the answers a child can understand, you still find yourself lost and on the wrong page of the book. As for the hippie remark, it’s cute how you still miss the entire fucking point of the photograph and accompanying. For fuck’s fucking sake, you god damned dolt, carry on with the eating of paste and crayons, as you have little chance on keeping up with the rest of the class. Ya fucking cunt ass douche.

          • Frank

            No, I didn’t miss the point, my perspective just didn’t validate your anger-clouded bias.
            Nice demonstration of your (limited) command of English, though. You obviously have the vocabulary of someone who may or may not have progressed beyond the Ninth Grade.
            Anybody who is compelled to disparage others for having a different perspective is a sad and pathetic dolt. Just say’in, bro. You get that, right?

          • Joe2D2

            Yeah, you missed the point and maybe now, after hours of contemplation, your feeble mind is beginning to eek out a conclusion the rest of us saw immediately. Good try though, idiot. Taking a break from paste and crayons?

          • Frank

            Let it go, man. You’ve taken this to a whole new level of stupid.

          • freedom74

            You start off as an aggressive jackass and then get mad when people show aggression back to you. If anyone sounds like a liberal hippy idiot, it’s you bud. Grow up you childish dolt.

          • Frank

            Buzz off. I was defending the right to voice an opinion that wasn’t as full of hate or disrespect of others as the responder. I thought the article was a waste of breath as all it does is amplify the stereotypical bias of bureaucratic waste.

  • So how many tyrants DOES it take to water a tree?

    • Joe2D2

      Heheheh, by the look of it, I count 4. Two to water the tree, and two to hold the umbrellas in the rainstorm so the more privileged tyrants don’t get their 20 thousand dollar monkey suits wet.

      • Paulafjohnson2

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    • BigGaySteve

      Just one but you have to cut the carotid artery.

      • mirageseekr

        Ya, that tree of liberty could use a good watering.

    • RandyJ/ProudSurvivor

      Depends on how big of a tree it is….and whether it’s an evergreen or deciduous…planted in sand or soil….degrees of daily sunlight…hardwood or softwood… Christ-looks like we’ll need a new agency to oversee such important business…

    • Razedbywolvs

      It’ takes 1 tyrant with 1 carrot and a flock of sheep.

  • RE

    Save water! Shower with a fur….

  • Trees can’t drown, maybe root rot, but…

  • cynic

    After the tree dies the commemorative plaque may still be there, giving a further insight into the vanity of much governmental activity.

    • RandyJ/ProudSurvivor

      The handbook of government waste dictates that the dead tree be given a headstone as well…

  • jaguar

    Because you know…idiots!

  • Razedbywolvs

    So this is what a carbon based economy looks like.

  • Broos

    Umbrella’d : Obviousliy NOT Apparatchik plants !

  • billyjackeng

    Spent a lot of time in Ashgabat. I do appreciate that in Turkmenistan you can smoke anywhere, but outside because Gurbanguly doesn’t like the way it looks.

  • Sonokar

    I wonder where they brought the water from?

  • Rayven Wrathchild

    You guys are missing the point. This is a secret Illuminazi ritual. (lol)

  • djw663

    M O R O N S!